Sally Cousens and John Stuckey

Perfect timing

Sally and John first met at UNE late in 1971, during Sally’s second year of studying Biological Sciences and John’s fourth year of Agricultural Economics. Duval College resident Sally was at UNE’s Arrawarra Coastal Field Station on prac when long-haired, bearded John and his Earle Page College mate Graeme McLeod – who were meant to be studying at Graeme’s family’s beach house nearby – crashed a party.

“I can still remember seeing Sally across the room and, as I said at our wedding, I thought she was the prettiest girl I had ever seen,” John says. “I don’t know what happened after that, but over the next year we went out a bit, but not like big time.”

Sally recalls inviting John to a Duval cabaret and, the next year, asking him to accompany her to a family event. “My brother Peter was at The Armidale School, performing in Mikado, and my parents had come up from Tamworth to see the performance,” she says.

John accepted. The trouble was, he was playing in the rugby grand-final that day.

“I was doing my Masters by then and I think Page was playing Wright College,” John says. “Anyway we won, and I was on the grog for an hour or two, and then had to leave the celebrations early to get ready. I still can’t believe that I agreed to it; it must have been an indication that I was pretty interested in her.”

The pair then only saw each other occasionally. “We weren’t an item,” Sally says. “I don’t know whether he gave me enough encouragement … but we missed the opportunity.”

“Sally usually had guys at her feet and I had other girlfriends,” John says.

Having lived in Tamworth and Armidale, Sally was very keen to head to the city upon completing her degree. “I was one-tracked and wasn’t going to let any boy get in my way,” she says. “But I always had a bit of a soft spot for John Stuckey, and every now and then I would wonder what became of him. I actually have letters I wrote to my parents saying that I was attracted to John.”

“I’m sure I would have thought about Sally every now and then,” says John, “and that I shouldn’t have let her slip through my fingers. I was young and made some bad decisions in that period.”

Although the pair had many UNE friends in common, who got together regularly, their paths didn’t cross in the 38 years that followed. Sally married and had three children; John married and had two.

Fast-forward to 2008 and John was having lunch with fellow Earle Page resident and friend Pete Dunn in Sydney. Pete had mentioned John’s divorce to Sally’s best friend Susie Aylward (whom she met in the carpark when they both first arrived at Duval at the age of 17) and her husband Mark Dickinson (also a UNE graduate), and Pete encouraged John to give Sally a call, writing her mobile phone number on a beer coaster.

But it would sit in John’s top desk drawer for several months.

By December that year, Sally was hosting Christmas drinks for returning friends Mick O’Connor (also from UNE) and his wife. She saw John’s name on an email list of friends that was circulated and decided to invite him, too, “just to see what happened”.

“John RSVPed a couple of days later and that was exciting for me, wondering what he was going to be like,” Sally says. “When this bald guy walked up my hall, before I could stop myself I said ‘Oh my God, what happened to your hair?’”

“It did wonders for my confidence,” says John.

After a great night, John hung around until late, to ask Sally out to dinner, but left without taking her number. A few days later he rang, all thanks to that beer coaster.

“We were very excited about seeing each other again,” Sally says. “I think we both knew, at the party that night, that this was it. It was just the right time.”

John says they soon recognised that their relationship could be serious and it moved quickly after that. Wedding bells rang in 2014.

“For me, it’s uncomplicated,” says Sally. “At this stage in our lives, we don’t have to think about children or careers. It is just us and our relationship. We really do have some very basic beliefs and values in common, and we share numerous old UNE friends, common experiences and memories. We had a past in common and that provides a strong base for a relationship. We didn’t have to start from scratch.”

Romance, second time around, is sweet indeed.

“We have a lot to thank Pete, Susie and Mark for,” says John. “We’re the lucky ones.”

“Very lucky,” Sally adds. “Sometimes the timing is just right.”