Ian: Julie was my first girlfriend. She was sweet and I liked her a lot. I lived at home in town and she lived on campus in the old Army Huts that were installed to accommodate students. Men were not allowed to visit, so I had to get a chair to stand on to talk to her at her window; I wasn’t visiting, just chatting. I still joke with her about being ‘the window man’.
Julie: All the girls who had boyfriends had to talk to their boyfriends through the windows. It was quite funny. I had a little electric jug and would pass out cups of tea to Ian. We enjoyed each other’s company a lot; I didn’t know I was madly in love, but I was. He had blown me over and I was besotted.
Ian: I remember we went to dances in the Armidale Town Hall.
Julie: I remember being chuffed to attend the university ball with Ian.
Ian: I was part of the first national service intake in 1957, but I wasn’t made to be a soldier; few of us were really. During the three months of Nasho’s in Holsworthy I used to go up to the Salvation Army quiet room, where I would write to Julie, and she would write back. I still have those letters.
Julie: I think the letters meant a lot to the men and helped ease the burden.
Ian: Julie later met my parents and I met her parents in Tamworth when I was jackerooing on a property just north of Bendemeer. But at the end of the two years, I had a choice to make. Going to university in Sydney to study Law meant leaving Julie. It was a wrench.
Julie: When Ian left, I was quite sad. I don’t remember whether I thought I would ever see him again. You live very much in the present when you are 18 or 19.
Ian: At Sydney Uni, I met my wife Tricia, which was the best thing I ever did in my life. We just clicked. It was an amazing compatibility that lasted 48 years of marriage.
Julie: I went on to become a teacher and married a fellow who had also been at UNE and was also named Ian. We had two children, but the marriage didn’t last.
Ian: I never really thought of Julie again until years after Tricia had died. I couldn’t even think of another woman while she was alive. But I thought I would like to talk to someone and I wondered what Julie was up to. I tracked her down in Victoria, and we have corresponded regularly for the past four years or so.
Julie: I was delighted when Ian contacted me. I had heard from a mutual friend that he’d been very sad after the loss of his wife. I hope my emails are helpful to Ian. He obviously adored his wife and there’s absolutely no way anyone can replace that, but at least I can provide a listening ear. It’s always good to get his emails and I share my passions of music and gardening.
Ian: Julie plays the organ and absolutely loves Bach. I prefer Mozart. I send her books about gardening and things that I write. We talk about where we are up to in life.
Julie: Our friendship goes back a long way. We were really lucky with what we had.
Ian, 85, graduated with an Arts degree from UNE in 1958, went on to study Law at the University of Sydney and worked for 40 years as a solicitor in Armidale. A founding president of the UNE Alumni Association, he is an historian and author of seven books and still calls Armidale home.
Julie, 86, also graduated with an Arts degree in 1958 and became a primary school teacher. At the age of 49 she realised her lifelong dream to study music, at the University of Melbourne, and she is now the organist at her parish church in Victoria’s Dandenong Ranges.
They haven’t seen each other since 1959.
